Dressing for the Job

This one particular day I was sent to a school to sub for a teacher only to find out once I arrived at said school that the teacher had gotten a new job at a different school.

Not to panic. It wasn't too far from the school I was already at so in just a few more minutes I would be at the proper school and all would be alright.

So I arrive at the proper school and find my classroom only to find out that the teacher is still in the building and just getting ready to leave for some PD. That's fine. He can just tell me about the day and I don't have to read through a sub plan.

But let's back up. I want to tell you what I decided to wear this day!... it's important so just go with it!

Since the job description clearly said I would be a science teacher I opted for some flip flops and a black skirt and some kind of shirt... that's not really the important part.. the skirt part is.

So anyways, the teacher fills me in on the day looks at me and goes "oh by the way, I teach a couple classes of gym"

Well this is just dandy. I am clearly not dressed for any kind of gym class.

Gym class rolls around for the last couple of periods of the day. It's a boys class which is even better and they decide to spend it outside playing baseball.

So we head outside and luckily for me no one wants the substitute wearing a skirt and flip flops to be on their team so I stand around outside acting like I know what I'm doing but mostly just hoping no one runs away and that maybe I'll get a little bit of a tan from this.

A photo of my most recent day of a surprise phys-ed teacher.  I did have runners in my trunk but when I went to pick up my first group of kids the teacher smiled at me and said "you're far too cute to be the phys-ed teacher".  So I rocked my flats and my cute look instead. 

Arrival Times

I'm going to make the first tip post an obvious one. Get to the school early. No need to be there insanely early (do not get there before the custodian - how will you get in?!?). I like to arrive anywhere between 15 minutes to 30 minutes early. This gives you time to read the plan for the day, do any photocopying that the teacher has left you, find the attendance sheet, and locate the staff washrooms.

If you aren't going to get there early for any of the above listed reasons then get there early because you likely want to be a teacher someday and this is just a stepping stone to that job. Arrive for the job you want (not necessarily the job that you have).

Having said all of this... yes I have walked in to the sound of the bell (alright, it was actually the sound of the announcements and "Oh Canada" but what can I say the parking lot was confusing and it only happened once (thank goodness).

Class Pets

Class pets are popular amongst the early years. It teaches them the responsibility to care for another living thing (those teachers who don't like pets in their classroom will often have plants and it will be someone's responsibility to make sure that the plant is getting enough water - not quite the same but I guess a plant is still a living thing).

Anywho, I've seen everything from fish to gerbils. This story is about that later.

Gerbils. What a curious little creature. They would probably roll around in those little balls for hours if we let them (although, it's not like they would have a choice because we also trap them in there). The classroom I was in this particular day had 1 gerbil and some little frogs swimming happily in their enclosure (I just watched "We Bought a Zoo" and they aren't called cages - though in this case they are probably called tanks).

I knew they had a gerbil only because it was written about in the day plan from the teacher. Only it wasn't written "we have a pet gerbil please make sure someone feeds it and changes the wood shavings in the enclosure" (she probably would have used the word cage - how barbaric of that teacher). No it was not written like that at all. Instead it was more of a "by the by we have a pet gerbil that went missing yesterday, make sure the door is closed to the classroom so that it doesn't get out... wherever it is."

"Alright" I think "we have an animal at large in here... at least it's not a snake or a spider or a swarm of bees"

The class comes in and promptly announces their beloved Buttons has gone missing... have I found him?

The day goes on and poor Buttons is still at large. His enclosure (which I might add includes those crazy tunnels and everything... quite the set up for a classroom gerbil) is still sitting empty with the door to it wide open almost welcoming Buttons back home where there is food and water and tunnels to run through.

The day is coming to an end and Buttons has not returned back home. It was with heavy hearts that I send the children out for their final recess of the day. While I close myself in the classroom and start a report back to the teacher "oh the kids were mostly good, Buttons is still at large, Bobby hit Suzy, and most of them got their math done".... you know the usual kind of note.

The recess bell rings signalling the end of recess and I stand outside the classroom waiting for my students to line up so we can come back in. On the way in they hang their jackets in the closet and take a peek inside Buttons enclosure.

But wait something is different this time.

His home is not empty there is a gerbil in there!

"Huzzah" we all shout (ok, no one shouts it... we whisper it... or perhaps we all just think it)

The mysterious and allusive Buttons has returned home. The children promptly take him out and put him in his little rolly ball so that they can now clean his cage (why they didn't clean his cage when he was missing was beyond me).

The day is over and Buttons is placed back in his enclosure with the door tightly shut. What that little rascal got into while he was out exploring is beyond any of us. I'm just thankful no one stepped on him (and that I get to look like the hero because Buttons returned on my watch and clearly me being there had something to do with his triumphant return home.

Awesome Stories

Let's set the stage. It's a grade 8 class and the teacher had been reading The Book of Awesome to them. The assignment was to write 2 awesome stories and then type them out when we had time in the computer lab.

I pride myself in being one of those substitute teachers that is able to have fun with their students but also get (most) of the work done. Today was going to be no exception. The thing is some students were having trouble coming up with some awesome stories.

Brainstorming was the only thing I could come up with so we had a giant brainstorming session with the whole class that really wasn't getting very far. Finally, I sat down on the stool at the front of the room and stated "alright, I think we all know a pretty awesome substitute that we could write about". I was half kidding, half serious. Luckily, some students decided that they did have a pretty awesome substitute and wrote stories about yours truly.

It wasn`t until we got to the computer lab that I started to read some of these awesome stories about this awesome substitute. Many (most) of them turned out to be love letters about me.

Uhh.. awkward.

I informed my students that they would be handing these in to their teachers and they were apparently cool with it and honestly, at this point I was just happy that they had stories written. So they handed them in.

But they weren`t all love letters (thankfully)

One student decided to write about me (the most awesome substitute ever) and then in the last couple of lines of the stories admits that although I am awesome so is Mr So and So and we are both pretty awesome substitute teachers.

Did I try to convince this student to just end it with me being the one and only awesome substitute teacher? You bet. Did it work? Not at all.

Oh well... can't win them all.

Drawings

When you sub in an elementary school it is almost a guarantee that they will give you stuff to take home. It might be a drawing, or a piece of paper with glue all over it, or a coloured popsicle stick. I'll be honest, I usually toss most of the stuff kids give me in the trash on my way out the door and hope that the custodian empties the trash that night so that the kids will never know that their artwork is not currently hanging on my fridge.

But this picture... well it was just too good not to take home, scan, and post for everyone to see.

Here is the back story on the picture.

I was subbing in a grade 4/5 classroom and I had given them a free class providing they had the other work we had done that day finished up. Some played games, some chatted, some read, but these 2 boys decided that they wanted to draw pictures of me.


Please notice my Audi R8 with nice rims that shoot out fire to anyone driving beside me (so basically no one ever drives beside me). Also please notice my choice in footwear.

Here is the story behind the shoes:


Kid: “Can I draw you with Nike’s?”
Me: “are they the nicest shoes around?”
kid “Well Air Jordan's are”
Me: “Well then draw me with the Jordan's... I obviously need to be wearing the nicest shoes”.


So he drew me with Nike’s... I see how it is.

Other things to comment on about the picture:

1) The boy who did the drawing on the left really captured my Asian eyes

2) However, he also seems to think I have a rather large nose

3) I must have been suffering to allergic reaction to my lip chap that day... wowzers would look at those lips!

4) I also seem to be lacking a forehead.


The other kid (the drawer of the picture on the right) spent too much time on my face to draw the rest of me.Bottom of Form

I'll admit that after the free period we were supposed to move onto French but I just needed to see where these pictures were going so I started French late just so the boys could get further along in their drawings (but we did eventually move onto French - and get it done)